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Assassination Time (episode)/Transcript

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[Currently under transcription]
Koro Sensei ID Now, then. Let's begin homeroom. Class monitor, on your command.
Nagisa Shiota ID S-Stand! Attention! Bow!
Koro Sensei ID Good morning. I'll be taking attendance, so please, fire all you like. Isogai-kun?
Isogai-kun: Present.
Koro Sensei ID My apologies. I'll need you to speak up, what with all this gunfire.
Isogai-kun: Present!
Koro Sensei ID Okakima-kun?
OK:Present!
Koro Sensei ID Okuda-san?
Okuda-san: Present!
Koro Sensei ID Kataoka-san?
Kataoka-san: Present!
Koro Sensei ID Kayano-san?
Kayano-san: Present!
Koro Sensei ID Kanzaki-san?
Kanzaki-san: Present!
Koro Sensei ID All right. Everyone on time, I see.
Correct Kor Sensei Excellent! That makes me very happy.
He's too fast.
So even the whole class at once can't bring him down?
Nagisa Shiota ID We... are killers. And our target.... is our teacher.
Koro Sensei ID Too bad. Not one of your bullets hit me today, either. Tactics that rely on sheer numbers neglect individual focus. Be on line of sight, barrel position, or finger movement. Each of you was far too easy to read. You need to be more inventive! Otherwise, you'll never be able to kill me. I can speed up to Mach 20, you know?
But, like, see... There's no way you seriously dodged all of those!
I mean, these are just BB pellets. You could have just taken them on the chin.
Yeah, that's right.
Koro Sensei ID Very well, Gather up the BBs and them over. I told you: these may be harmless to you... But they're special anti-me BB pellets developed by the government. If one hits me, it'll slice through my cells like tofu. They'll regenerate a few seconds later, of course. I'm more concerned about you putting a classmate's eyes out. No shooting in the classroom unless you're trying to kill me.
KSC:And I hope you can kill me before graduation.
Koro Sensei ID Now then, let's put away the arms and ammunition and begin class.
Nagisa Shiota ID At Class 3-E of Kunugigaoka Junior High School, the assassination class room, the bells signal the start of another school day. Now here's a question. Isogain-kun!
Isogai-kun: Y-Yes, sir?
Koro Sensei ID Which of these four tentacles is not like the others?
Isogai-kun: Um... the blue one?
Correct Kor Sensei Correct! The only relative pronoun is "who," in the blue sentence. A relative pronoun modifies the noun right before it, so the clause. "Who is stand over there?" describes the "boy" here.
Kaede Kayani ID Hey, Nagisa, The crescent moon's out in th e broad daylight.
Nagisa Shiota ID How did we end up in this mess? As we began our third year of junior high, we were greeted by two extraordinary incidents. The first was the sudden explosion that left the moon permanently crescent-shaped.
Nasa's News Reporter 1: We interrupt this program to bring you breaking news.
Nasa's News Reporter 2: We've just gotten word that about seventy percent of the moon has been vaporized into nothing. I repeat...
Nasa's News Reporter 3: Will we have only a crescent moon to look at for the rest of our lives?
Nagisa Shiota ID And the second was his arrival.
Koro Sensei ID How do you do? I'm the one who tore that chunk out of your moon. I plan to do the same to the Earth next year. But until then, I'll be your teacher. Nice to meet you.
NS:These were at least six things wrong with this picture! The feeling unanimous
Karasuma ID I'm Karasuma, from the Ministry of Defense. First, please understand what I'm about to say is classified information. Let me be blunt/clear: I want you to kill this creature.
BH:Um... What's the deal? Is he an alien invader or something?
Koro Sensei ID How rude! I'll have you know I was born and raised on Earth!
Nagisa Shiota ID He was?
Karasuma ID I'm afraid I can't discuss the details, but he's telling the truth. And as he said, he won't stop at the moon. Next year... he will destroy the Earth as well. Only the world's leaders know about this. If the news of this guy out out there, we'd be looking at a global panic. That's why we have to kill him in secret before that happens. In other words: as assassination. But here's the catch. His speed is unmatched! You try to kill him, and he ends up grooming your eyebrows instead--immaculately! He's a super being with enough power to reduce the full moon to a crescent. His speed tops out at Mach 20!. In short, if he actually wanted to get away from us, we wouldn't be able to do a thing to stop him.
Koro Sensei ID But where's the fun in that? So I made your government an offer. They will refrain from attempts on my life. And in return, I'll teach Class 3-E at Kunigigaoka Junior High School.
Nagisa Shiota ID What? Why?
Karasuma ID We don't know what he's after. But we had no choice to agree, on the condition that he doesn't harm any of you students. We have to reasons for this. First and foremost, if he's coming to a classroom every day to teach, we can keep an eye on him. And second, it gives some thirty people the opportunity to kill him from an extremely close range.

Koro Sensei ID Nakamura-san. Didn't I tell you not to let assassination interfere with your studies?
NS:Sorry.
LS:Stand at the back for the rest of this lesson and think about what you've done!
Nagisa Shiota ID "How could you make this creature our teacher?" "And why are you making us assassinate him?" These cried fades as one final condition was announced.

Karasuma ID Your success will be rewarded with ten billion yen. It's only fair. If you can assassinate, you will be Earth's savior. Fortunately, he doesn't think much of you. See? Those green stripes mean he's looking down on you.
What is he, a chameleon?!
KSC:Of course I am! If the government can't kill me, how could you? Even when they sent their newest fighter jet after me, all it got was a good waxing right there in midair.
Fighter Pilot:What's with all the grooming?!
Karasuma ID So while this guy looks down on you, your job is to find an opening in his defenses and strike it. We'll provide you with weapons and ammo that won't hurt humans but will work on him. You must keep this a secret from your friends and family. There's no time to lose. If the Earth is destroyed, we'll have nowhere left to run. And that's about it.
Koro Sensei ID Well then, I hope you'll make most of your one remaining year!

Nagisa Shiota ID We only have one year. If we can't assassinate him by then, the Earth will be history.
Koro Sensei ID Ah, lunchtime! I'll just pop over to China for some mapo tofu. If anyone would like to try assasinating me, just call me on my cell.
NS:Let's see... if he's traveling at Mach 20... it'll take maybe to get to Sichuan, the home of mapo tofu. Guess no missle could shoot that down. Heck, that octopus even grades tests while he breaks the sound barrier!
Seriously?!
Isogai-kun: He even did a little drawing on mine. Isn't he a pretty good teacher, though?
RD:He is! I aced my math test thanks to his after-school tutoring!
BH:Yeah, but... we are the E Class. Tryin' our best won't do much.
Yeah...
Nagisa Shiota ID He might be an octopoid super-being-not to mention our target-but... for whatever reason, he's teaching us like any other teacher would. Likewise, we're perfectly normal students outside of the whole killer thing, but E Class is a little different from the rest.
Terasaka ID Hey, Nagisa. Come with us. It's time to put our assassination plan into action.

Terasaka ID That octopus's face changes color according to his mood, right? Did you note down all the variations like I asked?
Nagisa Shiota ID More or less. It's striped green when he's feeling confident, as we all know. We we give an incorrect answer, it's dark purple. A correct answer makes it go bright scarlet. But what's really interesting is after lunch, when-
Terasaka ID I don't need to know all that. I have a plan. And at the moment he least expects it, you going to carry it out.
Nagisa Shiota ID M-Me? But...
Terasaka ID Don't be such a goody-goody. We're the E Class, the rejects that failed to keep up at this famous prep school.
Nagisa Shiota ID They call us... the End Class. Every day, they send us to this isolated mountaintop campus and discriminate against us in every way like we're scum.
Terasaka ID You think us losers are ever gonna get another chance to score a coll ten billion yen? We're gonna climb our way out of this forsaken place... in anyway we can. Just don't screw up, Nagisa-kun.

Student 1:I heard Nagisa's headed for E Class. Ooh. Well, that's it for him. I better delete him from my address book.
Student 2:Same. I don't want anybody to think I'm on his level.

Koro Sensei ID I'm back!
Nagisa Shiota ID H-Hello, sir... What's with the missile?
Koro Sensei ID A souvenir. The Self-Defense Force ambushed me over the Sea of Japan.
Nagisa Shiota ID I-It must be tough, having everyone after your life.
Koro Sensei ID Not at all. You know you're truly powerful when everyone has it in for you. Now, I do believe fifth period began.
Nagisa Shiota ID Yes, sir...
Nagisa Shiota ID He doesn't understand... If you're everyone's assassination target, that means they all acknowledge your power. A creature like that wouldn't stand what it's like for no one to expect or fear anything from you or even acknowledge your existence...

TE:Thanks to you, my evaluation's in the gutter! The only silver lining is I'll never have to see you again.
Nagisa Shiota ID I might just be able to kill him. After all, this teacher can't see me, either.

Koro Sensei ID All right, then. Compose a short poem to go along with our theme. The final line should be "was tentacles all along."
RD:Huh?
SI:"Was tentacles all along"?
Koro Sensei ID Indeed! When you're finished, bring them to me. I'll be looking for proper grammarm and whether you've aptly conveyed the tentacle's beauty. An example: "Not the storm of garden's snow Or flowers moving on But sprouting there instead Was tentacles all along."
CP:We have to write it was a tentacle? Really?
Koro Sensei ID Once you're done, you're free to go home.
RD:Huh? How are we gonna write about that?
Koro Sensei ID Now, now... Aren't any marvelously slithery phrases coming to mind? Slither slither slither slither!
BH:Enough with the slithering!
Kaede Kayani ID I have a question!
Koro Sensei ID Yes, Kayano-san?
Kaede Kayani ID It feels weird to only ask this now, but... what's your name?
Koro Sensei ID Hmmm?
Kaede Kayani ID How else are we supposed to refer to you specifically?
Koro Sensei ID My... name?
CP:Now that you mention it...
CKaede Kayani ID He never did tell us.
Koro Sensei ID Hmm... I don't really have the kind of name you tell people. Go ahead and give me one.
BH:You sure about that?
Koro Sensei ID But right now, focus on your schoolwork.
Kaede Kayani ID Yes, sir.
Koro Sensei ID Meanwhile, I'll just take a little break.
Nagisa Shiota ID Hmmm...
Koro Sensei ID Finished already, Nagisa-kun?
Nagisa Shiota ID After lunch, right around the time we get sleepy, his face sometimes go light pink. He was a little slow responding to Kayano's question, too. That might be when he's at his most vulnerable. We prep-school failures are always thinking, "We gotta get back at them somehow. We will show our parents, friends, and teachers that we can do it if we try. We can do it if we.. try."
Koro Sensei ID Didn't I tell you to be more inventive?
Nagisa Shiota ID We have to prove ourselves... by any means necessary.
Terasaka ID Hell yeah!
Takuya ID We did it!
Kaede Kayani ID Nagisa!
Terasaka ID Ten billion yen! Cha-ching! Serves you right!
BH:eraska, what have you done?!
Terasaka ID Bet he never expected a suicide bomber!
Kaede Kayani ID Hey! What'd you give Nagisa?!
Terasaka ID Huh? A toy grenade. But I beefed it up with some gunpowder so it'd shoot three hundred anti-teacher bullets at a crazy-high speed! It's nothing strong enough to kill human beings, all right? My ten billion yen will cover his medical bills no prob- He's not hurt? Not even a single burn? And what's this membrane? It's attached to that octopus' corpse?
Koro Sensei ID I shed my skin about once a month. I protected Nagisa-kun there by covering him with my old skin. It's my once-monthly ace-in-the-hole. Terasaka, Yoshido, Muramatsu.
Nagisa Shiota ID You don't have to look at the color of his face to know. Pitch black! He's furious!
KSB:You three... are responsible for this, aren't you?
TM:N-No!
Terasaka ID It was all Nagisa's idea! He's gone!
The nameplates from our house?!
My agreement with your government prohibits me from harming you. But if you try another assassination like that one... I might just harm someone else. Your friends, family. Maybe I'll kill everyone on the planet except you.
Nagisa Shiota ID It only took five seconds for everyone to understand. Nowhere ont his planet was safe. Our only escape from this situation... was to kill him.
Terasaka ID What the hell's your deal, anyway? You're a real pain in the back! Showing up all "I'm gonna blow the Earth" and "Assassinate me"! What's wrong with using an annoying method to kill an annoying guy?!
Correct Kor Sensei Annoying? Hardly. Your idea itself was a very good one. Especially you, Nagisa-kun. The way you carried yourself so naturally on your approach gets full marks from me. You did an excellent making it past my defenses. However! None of you looked out for Nagisa-kun-- Not even Nagisa-kun himself. Students like that aren't fit to assassinate.
Wrong Koro Sensei ID Anyone.
Koro Sensei ID We need an assassination worth smiling about- one to be proud of! You're all capable assassins who have that power within you. Just a few words of advice from your teacher-slash-target.
Nagisa Shiota ID One moment we were beinbg chewed out at Mach 20 and the next we were being praised with waving tentacles. It wasn't your average education, but it made me happy. All because this unusual teacher was actually willing to look us in the eye.

DC:If you... If you're willing to give up your time, go teach those children. What splendid tentacles. With hands like these, I'm sure you'll be a splendid teacher.

Koro Sensei ID Let me ask you a question, Nagisa-kun. I have not the slightest intentions of being killed. I will enjoy my time with you until next March. And then I'll blow up the Earth. If you don't like that idea, what do you plan to do about it?
Nagisa Shiota ID We never assassinated anyone before, and there's plenty of other stuff we should be doing. But, you know... I think this teacher might even accept us trying to kill us.
Nagisa Shiota ID Before you destroy Earth... I'll kill you.
KSC:Then what are you waiting for?
Koro Sensei ID Once you've killed me, you're free to go home!
Students:Just like that, huh?
You know we can't kill you!
Nagisa Shiota ID We are killers. And our target... is our teacher.
Koro Sensei ID Wipe, wipe, wipe it clean.
Kaede Kayani ID An unkillable teacher...
Nagisa Shiota ID Huh?
Kaede Kayani ID "Korosenai" for "unkillable," and "Sensei" for "Teacher." Oh! What about "Korosensei"?
Nagisa Shiota ID Korosensei?
Koro Sensei ID Huh?
Nagisa Shiota ID So here we are with Korosensei... in our classroom full of assassins. The bells signal the start of another day.

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